We deal with many clients who are not drinking problematically themselves, but whose life has been adversely affected by someone else’s drinking. That may be a spouse or partner, a child or parent, other close family members or close friends. 
We treat these cases with the same amount of importance and priority as we would with a drinker. These situations can be extremely distressing for the person not drinking as they often have no idea what to do, and may feel helpless with regards to helping the person who is drinking.
For most people accepting that alcohol is causing a problem can be difficult, as the person involved may be resistant to questioning, they may possibly lie and go to great lengths to hide their drinking. They could get aggressive so the person living with them will not usually know how best to handle the situation.
It is important to impress on this person that they cannot stop someone drinking but they can, within boundaries, support them with the help of professional organisations such as apas.
Are worried about the drinking habits of someone close to you?
Does their drinking and your response to it make the atmosphere in your home tense and anxious?
Are you afraid of verbal or physical abuse when they are drinking?
Are you trying to control their drinking?
Are you taking responsibility for the consequences of their drinking, for example paying bills, working extra to replace
money spent on drink, making excuses for their behaviour?
You need to know that:
You can’t control another persons drinking pattern
You don’t cause another person to drink
You are not responsible for another persons drinking
You can’t cure another persons drinking problem
